When 'Go Dry' Goes Wrong: Powerful Lessons from an Accidental Relapse

In this episode of the Super Butterfly podcast, host Nadine shares a personal story of an accidental relapse into alcohol consumption after three years of sobriety. She details how it happened during a dinner with friends in Brooklyn and the emotions she experienced—initial shock, shame, and denial. Nadine reflects on important lessons from the incident, including the value of community, the importance of self-compassion, understanding triggers, and learning to forgive oneself. She offers insights on how to navigate setbacks in sobriety and emphasizes that such moments are opportunities for growth and reaffirmation of one's commitment to sobriety.

00:00 Welcome to the Super Butterfly Podcast

01:32 The Accidental Relapse: Setting the Scene

03:22 The Relapse Story Begins

07:42 Realization and Reaction

18:33 Lessons Learned from Relapse

33:06 Final Thoughts and Takeaways

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Transcript

the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_120239: 0:07

Hello, and welcome to the Sober Butterfly podcast. I am Nadine and this week's episode was inspired by entirely true events. Last week, I was minding my own business at dinner. With some friends and I accidentally relapsed. Yeah, it can happen to the best of us. I Literally drank alcohol and I had no idea I was drinking it at the time But as soon as I discovered my grave mistake, I Immediately went to default mode, which was to hide and feel ashamed. I didn't want anyone to know even the people I was at dinner with. I didn't want them to know my friends, let alone did I want you guys at home to hear this on the podcast, but I feel. A sense of personal responsibility to share this truth with you 1 thing that 3 years of sobriety has taught me is the value of community. Like, you guys, the value of truth truth, like, sharing something that. Happened to me that I'm not proud of and lastly, transparency, being open about the fact that we are perfectly human or perfectly flawed. And so this week's episode, I'll be getting into all of that. You'll hear the story and maybe you'll take some lessons because I have great lessons. I want to share from this accidental relapse with you.

the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_123720: 1:32

Before we get into the accidental relapse story, I want to give you some context. Context is crucial. So the last time we spoke, I was getting ready to go to Greece and Turkey for my summer vacation. I had a ball with two of my girlfriends. We made lifelong memories, so many laughs, so many good moments. Not a sip of alcohol was consumed on that trip. As I planned 1 thing about me is I'm a good planner. I've taken enough sober trips to know exactly what I need to anchor my sobriety. And at no point did I feel triggered even going to beach clubs, being around people, Mykonos those party island. Right? Having so much fun being in. An environment catered to drinking in an ecosystem where lots of things are happening. I felt good about my sobriety coming out of that trip, though, coming back to reality, coming back to the city to New York, where I live, I felt lost. And that's why this is relevant. I need to be more intentional about not just planning to have a sober vacation, but also being mindful about what life can look like coming back, coming back when you're not so excited about life because you've just had the highest highs on vacation, coming back to work, being thrust into your routine, again, feeling jet lagged, having anxiety about not. Being up and current with all of the things that we have to do. These details matter. And so, for me, coming back from that vacation, going straight to work, giving myself no buffer time to rest really. Played a role. And I think this relapse, I recognize that now at the time, of course, didn't suspect that I was going to accidentally relapse.

the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_125137: 3:22

Okay, without further ado, let's get into the story of my accidental relapse. It all began with a text from my friend, Joey. Now, Joey lives in LA. We've been friends for over 12 years. He's known me since college. So, he has seen, Many iterations of me, party girl, me, sober me, you name it, everything in between. And so with him being here in New York visiting for only a couple of days, I had a very small window of opportunity to see him. And I really wanted to show up for him the way he's shown up for me in the past. Joey has been through some big life events as of I, and so I say that to say, I just wanted to show up for my friend. Tuesdays typically are not a good dinner day for me, even if I wasn't struggling with jet lag. It's not a day that I would probably be like, yeah, let's go to dinner. But like I mentioned, he was only here for a very brief period of time. And so I wanted to make an effort and make an effort I did. So I went all the way to Brooklyn. I don't live in Brooklyn and I work. In the city, so I was going away from where I live to go have dinner with him and a couple of his friends.

the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_130034: 4:31

I arrived first at the restaurant called Mao Mao Mao Mao is this fun bar restaurant in Brooklyn. It transports you to Thailand. You feel like you're sitting in like a Thai movie theater house. Even the seating has the old school movie theater chairs. They actually weren't very comfortable. I digress. there's like a huge giant projector that's playing various vintage videos of Thailand. The music was on point and it's so dimly lit that they have lanterns on the table

the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_130616: 5:09

going into Mau Mau, I was already tired. Sitting in Mau Mau, waiting for Joey to show up, I was exhausted. I felt my eyelids grow heavier and heavier and the dim lighting was just making it perfect for me to take a nap. So I literally was like shutting my eyes and then I see Joey come downstairs with one of his friends and I'm like, Oh, he's here. Great. So I'm chatting with Joey and his friend, let's call her Crystal. And. Crystal lives in the neighborhood. She had been to Mama before, and so she had all of these great recommendations for food and drinks. And I was like, great. I shared with her in that moment that I was sober because I'm always looking for different non alcoholic options. And when they bought the menus out, we're using our flashlights. That's how dark it is to read the menu. And we're looking at the drink. Options because we're still waiting for one other girl to show up and so and the interim of me getting to know crystal and catching up with Joey. The waitress comes over to take our drink order. And so at this point. I'm not good at multitasking. I've been talking to crystal getting to know her. I've been catching up with Joey. I haven't been fully paying attention to the cocktail or the drink menu. And so I'm scanning the pages. Everyone else is ordering their drinks and I see. There are 2 drinks that are kind of separate away from the rest of the cocktails and there's a header on the menu that says, go dry

the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_131244: 6:37

So as I'm deliberating between the two go dry options, one has the cucumber juice, the seltzer, the other one had some kind of like florally fruit.

the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_130616: 6:48

I don't know the name of it and I've looked for this menu online and I cannot find it. So I apologize. I don't have the name of the cocktail or the mocktail, but I remember it definitely had seltzer. It definitely had cucumber juice.

the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_131244: 7:02

I overhear Crystal order 1 of the go dry drinks and she said. I want this 1 without alcohol to go dry without alcohol. Immediately I'm hearing go dry, which in my mind go dry means. No alcohol and then I hear her say alcohol free. So. Now it's my turn and I'm like, OK, I'll just get the other go dry drink. She ordered a different 1 for me, but there were only 2 go dry options. I said, I would like the other drink with the cucumber. Great. She takes the order. She's off. I keep talking to Joey and crystal, waitress returns with our drinks, sets them on the table and I start sipping

the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_131524: 7:42

my first impression of the drink was that there was something there when I see something there. I'm not referring to alcohol. Like, at no point did I think, oh, there's alcohol in this, but there was definitely a flavor that I was unfamiliar with. And so I sipped it, even made a comment. I was like, oh, like, this tastes good, but there's something there. I don't know what that is. And so Joey reaches over and he's like, oh, let me try. So he tries my drink. He's like, yeah, that's good. Then he tries Crystal's drink, and he's like, oh, I taste the soju in yours. And so she's like, oh, I asked for no soju. I don't like soju. I don't even know what soju is Soju is. An alcoholic beverage specific to Korea. And so I've been to that part of the world. I've only ever been to that part of the world sober. So I've never actually tried soju before. And so I'm doing research for this episode. I was like, well, what is soju? And it's described in taste as having a crisp, but neutral flavor, and some people compare it to an easier to sip Vodka and Vodka, if memory serves me correctly, which I used to drink a lot of Vodka, Vodka has more of a neutral undertone as well. It's an easy, more palatable thing to drink if you're sipping on something. Vodka is easy to mix with or just drink straight up because it doesn't have that. Powerful punch in the same way. And in fact, that's why so many heavy drinkers prefer to drink vodka because it doesn't leave such a lingering. Smell on your breath, so to speak. So anyway, soju is not vodka. It's compared to being like vodka, but it definitely has alcohol. And although it has less of an alcohol percentage, there's alcohol in there. Okay. So anyway, back to Joey, back to Crystal, back to me at the table. So Joey tries my drink. He tries Crystal's drink and he's like, Oh yeah, I taste soju in your drink, Crystal. But he's like, Nadine, there's no soju in yours. So I'm like, okay, great. I don't know what the I'm tasting, but maybe it's just a concoction of different flavors that they put inside of this mocktail. So we start ordering food. We're waiting for Joey's other friend to show up. She comes, let's call her Janie. Janie arrives at this point, we've ordered some small plates. They've come out, we're eating, we're chatting. I'm still sipping my drink. I'm probably like, a 3rd way through. I've had 3 sips of my drink and because Janie came later, she's ready to order drinks and so she's like, Oh, what are you drinking? So I point to her on the menu what I'm drinking. Then I offer, I was like, if you want, you can try mine. I don't drink. So if you want to see if you like this, you can get this. And then she's like, okay, I'll try yours. She tries mine. Then crystal offers the same, she tries crystals. And she goes, oh, I don't really like soju and there's soju in these. And I'm like, oh, like. In these, you mean in hers, right? And so she's like, well, I taste soju in both of them. And remember, I haven't tried Crystal's drink because there's soju in there. At least, Joey said that he felt like there was soju in there and I'm like, wait, what do you mean? I was like, you taste so June both of these and she's like, yeah, yeah. I feel like it's stronger in hers, but I still tasted in yours. So, then now I'm like, wait, what?

the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_152037: 11:07

So now I'm visibly shook. I go quiet and I think Joey picked up on my panic. So he's like, wait, no, no, no. I tried them. Crystal's drink has soju. I don't think Nadine's drink has soju. Let me try yours again, Nadine. So he reaches for my drink. He takes another sip. Then he reaches for Crystal's drink to compare and he sips hers and he's like, no, no, no. Like, yeah, I taste the soju and crystals. I'm not tasting soju in this, but now I am convinced that there is soju in my drink. So we call the waitress over and Joey asks the waitress, he's like, excuse me, is there soju in this? Referring to my drink. And she looks and she's like, yeah, you ordered blah, blah, blah. Forgot the name of it. And so Crystal's like, what about my drink? She's like, yeah, there's soju in both of these. I found my voice finally, and I'm like, but it says go dry, and I said, no alcohol, and she's like, yeah, like, go dry, like, it tastes dry, and I'm like, whoa, whoa, that's misleading, no, like, if you say go dry, it means, like, Go without alcohol. No, like dry as in the verb to remove alcohol. Like, this is what I'm thinking. At least like in the sober community. How many sober accounts do we see with the name dry? Something? My very friend Ellie over at dry in the desert is all about sobriety and being dry. So I don't know. I just thought it was a common thing around the world that go dry means. No alcohol not go dry as in it's dry like a martini So the waitress looks at me like I'm crazy and she's like no dry like it's not sweet It's dry dry So I'm like, now accepting that there's alcohol in this drink, and the alcohol is the soju. I immediately tell the waitress, I'm like, I don't drink. I don't drink. I don't drink. Like, what do you mean? And she's like, so you don't want this. And once again, she's kind of looking at me like I'm crazy and I'm like, no, I don't want this. So she takes it and she's like, well, what do you want instead? And since Janie had just ordered a seltzer, I was like, I will also take a seltzer. So she just takes my drink and walks away. Crystal keeps her drink and it is awkward. Okay. It is awkward for many beats. Everyone can tell that I'm freaking out and I'm trying my very best to not freak out, but I'm just kind of like, wow, I can't believe that happened. And I repeat myself. Like, I can't believe that happened. And everyone's like, no, no, no, it's okay. It's okay. I was in shock. Like, that's the best way I could describe it. I was in shock. And then Once acceptance started to roll in, once I started to realize, no, I really did drink a third of this, like three big sips of this drink, and there was alcohol in it, there's soju in this, I freaking have relapsed. Like, how did this happen? How? After three years of being so careful of asking a million and one follow up questions, confirming there's no alcohol in this, right? There's no alcohol on this. This is alcohol free. This is a mocktail, blah, blah, blah. Like how could I have been so careless? I felt stupid. That's the best way I could describe it. I felt ashamed, and I felt stupid all at once. And so immediately I'm like, Oh my God, like I, I can't believe this happened. I don't even want to talk about it. And so everyone's trying to like perk me up and lift my spirits, but I am clearly Crestfallen, I'm defeated. I look defeated. I'm quiet. I'm no longer engaged in the conversation. People are eating, talking, and I'm just quiet and barely picking at my food. I just am really having a hard time processing the fact that I just drank. And while I'm not feeling anything, like I didn't feel. the slightest bit intoxicated, I start to feel paranoid. I'm like, at any moment, it's going to hit me and I'm going to start feeling myself lose control. I'm waiting for the ball to drop I'm imagining feeling the heat start to creep in, you know, when you first start feeling the alcohol, at least for me. It would be the sensation that would grow throughout my body. And so I'm bracing myself for that impact. I'm like, okay, it's going to come any moment now. And so I'm in my head, just a million and one thoughts are rolling in. Mainly I'm embarrassed and ashamed of myself. I've, you know, told everyone at the table that I'm sober. Joey, of course knows I'm sober and here I am having this big. Fuck up, so to speak. And finally, everyone's just like, Nadine, it's okay. Joey, Crystal, Janie, they're like, okay, like you're clearly upset. It's not a big deal. Like you didn't know, you didn't know. And the not knowing part, it made me feel a bit better. Like this clearly was not intentional. I did not mean to order an alcoholic beverage, but I felt like I should have known better. Like I felt like there were many steps I could have taken. I normally would employ. In that situation, if I maybe wasn't so tired, or if I wasn't jet lagged, or if I wasn't feeling like I shouldn't even be at this dinner at the first place, because really, I need to be in bed sleeping. I just felt like I should have done more in that moment to prevent something like that from happening. And then I was just fearful. I was afraid of what it would look like moving forward. I've heard so many times how important is to not drink because when you drink, that could lead to a true relapse. And I'm not taking this accidental relapse for granted. I consider what happened even though it was an accident to be a real relapse because I drank and for me. The not knowing was the scariest part, like not knowing how I would respond after consuming alcohol. Would I regress right back to where I was three? Years and change ago, when it was that 4th of July weekend in 2021, and I did everything under the sun because alcohol is the 1 entry bar that leads me to doing 1, 000, 001 other things and spiraling off the deep end. Was that going to happen or would I have more control after everything I've gone through? So I'll wrap the story at dinner just by saying that thankfully I was in good company. Thankfully, everyone at the table was super responsive and supportive in the fact that this was not my fault and I agree. I don't think it was my fault. Although I think I could have been more vigilant, I don't blame myself. I'm not saying like I am at fault, but I definitely feel it is my responsibility. And these are the lessons, I have learned walking away from this situation, walking away from that dinner. I had to do some deep introspection to come to this place where I now understand that a relapse is not the end of sobriety. So let's get into the lessons I've learned since my accidental relapse.

18:33

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the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_153212: 19:58

The first lesson I've learned from this experience is that relapse is a part of the journey. Recovery isn't always linear and a setback is just that. It's a setback. It is not an erasure. It does not erase any of the progress I've made over the last three years. And it really has served like this accidental relapse as an opportunity to check in with my sobriety. I've heard that relapse is a part of the journey, but if I'm being completely honest, I didn't think it would be a part of my journey. I didn't know it would be a part of my story until it happened to me. I've heard of other sober accounts relapsing, just similar to me, on accident. And I thought, oh, like, that sucks. but that's not my situation. That would not necessarily happen to me, and that's not to say that I think I'm better than anyone or stronger than anyone. I just felt really, really good and confident about where I was in my sobriety. And, like I said, usually, I'm pretty vigilant about confirming with wait staff, especially if I'm ordering drinks at a bar or a restaurant, just confirming that. There's no alcohol, I don't necessarily like to rely on assumptions just because something says alcohol free. Like, for example, if I'm at a bar, they will bring me out in any beer or something, especially with beers. They taste so similar to beer that has alcohol content, but I'm triple checking like, hey. Is this a nonalcoholic beer? I mean, I've gone so far as to if they just pour it for me and like a pint glass, no, bring me the bottle. Like, I want to confirm that this isn't any beer or this is a nonalcoholic drink. And I just did not do that this time. I think a big part of my reaction, which was at first denial, like, I truly was having a hard time swallowing the idea that I just. Drink alcohol or consumed alcohol once that denial faded and it became clear to me that I did. In fact. Relapse, or I did, in fact, consume alcohol. I mentioned this in the intro my default mode was to go into. Secrecy and when I was drinking. While I wasn't hiding my drinking per se from other people, I wasn't proud of the quantities that I was consuming. And so I was always minimizing the actual amount of alcohol that I drink, which is a part of living your life in secrecy, right? Like never wanting people to know that maybe before I attended a function, I had already pre gamed or drink a bottle of wine before a date, or I had something. In my system before I got to the place that I was drinking with others. it just reminded me, I literally went back to that feeling of, well, no one can know about this because if people know, then they'll judge me and being a sober influencer and having this platform. I felt like a hypocrite, like, what would I say? It's been 3 whole years and here I am consuming alcohol. Like, do people need to know about this? Because actually. Aside from the three of the witnesses here. Nobody needs to know, like, why would I share this? And so I think a big part of my fear of sharing it was, yes, partly judgment. I didn't want others to perceive me as being a hypocrite or being a liar. And then the other part was, well, What does that mean for the 3 years of sobriety that I've already lived? Does that just go away? Does my day count start at 1 again? Like, I had all of these big questions that were playing my next steps. Like, I was so consumed with the what ifs and how other people were going to perceive the situation that I hadn't even bothered to take the time to process how I was feeling in that moment about the situation. A big lesson I've learned and now I've had time to process is that I'm still sober. Okay. I don't care about my day count. I think that's great for milestones and to be proud of the steps that you've taken. But truly, I do believe it is one day at a time. And I think I was taking some of that sober time for granted. If I'm being honest, every day is beautiful. And whether I want to continue counting and say, you know what? This moment was just that a moment and it doesn't define my sober journey. So I'm going to say I'm three or sober, or if I went the completely opposite end of that and was like, you know what I drank today I drank. So therefore technically, as I record this podcast, I'm officially. You know, a week into my sobriety, this happened last Tuesday. So not even a week. Maybe I'm day 5 now. It doesn't matter because I have grown so much. Like, it is uncountable in all the ways I've grown in removing alcohol for my life. So I don't care and I don't see this as me erasing all of the progress I've made. If anything, this has helped me get more in tune with the progress I've made and not take for granted all of the work that goes into being sober. So, lesson number 1, relapse, whether it's accidental, like my situation or intentional, because you meant to drink or use, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter what you do, what led you to that moment of drinking. I think what's more important is how you respond. Learn more at www. cdc. gov After the fact, and for me responding by hopping on the mic and telling you guys this story is where the real progress can be measured because I could have pretended very easily that that never happened and kept it moving, but that wouldn't have felt good for me. That wouldn't have been my truth. And that would have defeated the purpose of this. There is a lesson that I have gathered from this experience and that. Lesson is truly that accidents are not always accidents. Maybe this was meant to happen. Maybe I was meant to have this moment so that I can get a bit more focused around the things that matter to me and the things that matter to me really isn't so external. It doesn't matter how I perceived from the outside world. It's how I perceive myself and I'm not a failure and I am not a day 1 sober girly. I take every day as it comes, but. The 3 years that I have been alcohol free have meant the world to me and I am continuing to grow from here. So, yeah, lesson number 1 relapse as a part of a journey

the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_154241: 26:41

My second lesson has everything to do with self compassion. Be kind to yourself, especially after a relapse and avoid self punishment. I was not kind to myself in that moment. I immediately thought that I was the problem. I felt stupid, as mentioned, I felt wronged. I felt like I deserved this punishment. I saw this as a failure, not as an opportunity to recommit to sobriety. And so it's just a helpful reminder that. Talking negatively that negative self talk or beating yourself up is never helpful in the situation. If anything that will drive you to continue drinking or to continue seeking out self destructive things and. I don't want to spiral and go back to how I was feeling when I was drinking and there's no point in punishing myself after this accidental relapse because the truth is I can't change it. I can't go back in time and order just the seltzer. It is something that I have to live with and move forward with. And being mean to myself is only going to hinder any progress. So, just encouraging you to always be Compassionate, how you would talk to your mother, your sister, your brother, whomever that you love and care about, if they were to tell you that they had a moment of weakness or that they accidentally drank alcohol or did something that they didn't intend to, how would you respond to them? Would you call them names? Hopefully not. Would you further try to make them feel worse about the situation? No, it's already happened. It's all about how you respond. As mentioned with the first lesson I've learned, it's all about how you move forward and decide to pick yourself up from that place that counts. And so it was just a nice way for me to remind myself that this is not a bad situation. It's instead a chance for me to really practice what I preach, which is being kind to myself and to others.

the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_154536: 28:54

The third lesson I would love to impart is understanding triggers. So I really set the scene for this, the context that I provided at the opening of this episode for a reason, because I was not understanding my triggers

the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_153212: 29:07

I already wasn't my highest self. I already felt drained. I already felt like I shouldn't be there. if I had maybe listened to my inner voice and gone with my intuition and not tried so hard to people, please. And like I said, like, I really do. Have good intentions around making sure I'm showing up for friends. But maybe if I had been a bit more honest or communicated with my friend that I wasn't really feeling my best and that, I'm sorry babe. I know you're just here for X amount of time, but I might not be able to see you or I'll have to check you out next time. if I had communicated that. I wouldn't have been in that situation. So it's just a reminder that sometimes when we force things, we open the doors for things to come in that we are not looking for that.

the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_154536: 29:55

When we think of triggers in regards to Our sobriety, I think we think of people, places, things, just like the literature tells us, or we think of, you know, being in settings that are catered to drinking. It was a Tuesday, a Tuesday at 6 PM. Like, I wasn't thinking that dinner at the time would be a trigger for me to drink alcohol. Triggers Are not 1 dimensional triggers can be anything related to stress specific social settings, unresolved emotions, like, all of these. Play a significant role and what can drive you to make decisions, and so, for me. I keep emphasizing this idea that, like, I kind of felt like I shouldn't have been there to begin with, but I went anyway, because I didn't want to let a friend down. Inadvertently, I ended up letting myself down and once again, that's not to harp on something in a negative light or beat myself up about something that I can't change. It is simply the fact that if I had understood. These triggers beforehand, I probably wouldn't have even been in the situation to allow something like that to happen. I would have been at home. I would have been prioritizing sleep and rest, which is what I really needed so make sure that you were constantly checking in with yourself and highlighting any triggers that you may or may not be aware of.

31:22

And now a quick word from our partners. It really feels like you're having a moment, pun intended, when you're sipping on the lovely and refreshing moment. Now what I love about moment is that not only does it taste delicious, I have my favorite flavors. I love the blood orange. I love the spicy mango, but it's also good for you, which is exactly what I need in my life right now as I'm in my early 20s. It's infused with L theanine, which is great for mental clarity. It also is packed with ashwagandha, which is great for helping to fight stress. It's made with all of these natural botanicals, which really enhances your vitality. It does not contain any added sugar. It's caffeine and of course alcohol free and you can purchase it in still or sparkling. I love a good sparkle moment so that's typically the route I take. In the morning it's great for a boost to start the day versus in the afternoon if you want to beat that afternoon slump and enhance your mental clarity. Or if you just need like a simple pick me up, like for me, I love to have a moment after the gym versus going into the gym because it just really helps re energize me. And then in the evening, if you want to wind down after a long, busy day and enjoy a delicious mocktail without the hangover, then Moment is great for that too. One of the best parts for me with Moment is I feel like it's a really conscientious brand. They donate 1 percent of all their sales to mental health non profits. So you can feel good about supporting greater causes as well. Head over to drinkmoment. com and use my code TSB23 to receive 12 percent off your very first order. Let's be moment buddies. We can both have moments together.

the-sober-butterfly_14_09-22-2024_161638: 33:06

I just want to wind down the episode by reminding us that although relapsing can feel like a step backward, it really is also a chance to grow and learn. And my accidental relapse has reminded me of a few key lessons that I want to leave with you. So number one, self compassion is key. It is not about perfection. It is truly about progress. So make sure that you're being kind to yourself during setbacks. These setbacks do not define you. Your journey does. The second thing I want to leave us with is awareness. Awareness is everything. Staying sober requires constant vigilance, especially in unexpected situations. This experience has taught me the importance of always being mindful of my surroundings and my triggers. Number three, community matters, isolation can lead to relapse, but leaning on the support system, whether it's friends, family, or a recovery group can help you get back on track faster. Forgiveness is freedom. The most important person to forgive after a relapse is yourself. Guilt will only hold you down. We have to let go of shame, learn the lesson, and move forward stronger. And lastly, reaffirm your why. Remember why you started your sober journey, whether it's for your health, your relationships, or your peace of mind. Keep that reason close and near to your heart, especially during tough times. Every misstep can be a step forward when we take the time to reflect and recommit to ourselves. If you've experienced a relapse, even an accidental one like me, know that you are not alone and that you can come back even stronger. Thank you for listening to this week's episode of the Sober Butterfly podcast. New episodes will continue to air every single Friday. Welcome to fall. I'm so excited to be back and I'm so excited to be sharing my stories this fall. See you soon. Bye.