Boos, No Booze: How to Have a Sober Halloween

Nadine shares her personal journey and tips for enjoying Halloween sober 👻🎃 She contrasts her past drunken Halloween experiences with her cherished, sober celebrations, offering insights and advice for those aiming to celebrate without alcohol.  She suggests practical strategies, like hosting your own party, being selective with your plans, and preparing non-alcoholic options. This episode encourages viewers to focus on meaningful fun and control over their decisions while highlighting sponsor messages from Moment and Audible. 

00:00 Welcome to The Sober Butterfly

00:43 Halloween Memories: Drinking Days

01:08 A Night to Forget

07:28 My First Sober Halloween

09:00 My First Sober Halloween

09:29 My Second Sober Halloween

11:50 Hosting My Own Sober Halloween Party

12:29 Tips for a Sober Halloween

14:08 Final Tips for a Sober Halloween

19:29 Wrap Up

Sponsors

Audible

Free 30 Day Trial

https://www.audibletrial.com/tsb24

Drink Moment

Use Code TSB23 for 18% off your order


Connect with Nadine 🦋
Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/the.soberbutterfly/

YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCn10zHObzJiRA5PBilZeXDQ

Newsletter:
https://thesoberbutterfly.com/

Transcript

the-sober-butterfly_7_10-24-2024_071130: 0:00

I was whipping people in the club.

the-sober-butterfly_5_10-24-2024_070502: 0:02

Hello, hello, and welcome back to the sober butterfly. I'm Nadine, and this is your favorite podcast for thriving in sobriety. Spooky season is upon us and with Halloween, just around the corner, I wanted to devote today's episode to how you can enjoy the spooky holiday without all of the booze. Halloween is actually one of my favorite holidays. But does look a little bit different for me today. so in this week's episode, I'll be sharing some stories about what Halloween was like for me before I quit drinking, how my sober Halloweens have been since then, and of course, I've got some unique tips for celebrating Halloween sober. Let's get into it.

the-sober-butterfly_6_10-24-2024_070746: 0:45

Let me take you back to what Halloween was like for me when I was still drinking I thought I was having fun, but in reality, a lot of those Halloweens ended with blurry memories, bad decisions, and a scary hangover. Does this sound familiar? And because Halloween was always a bit hazy for me, being under the influence of alcohol. I can't reference, you know, every specific Halloween that I celebrated while drinking, but one particular Halloween, and this would have been circa like 2019, pre pandemic for sure, My friends and I went to this huge costume party at a club and everyone was dressed to the nines.

the-sober-butterfly_7_10-24-2024_071130: 1:30

And I was so excited to be Catwoman that year. I promise this is relevant to the story, but I had my costume picked out months in advance. I was really excited for this look, for this party. My friend had a pregame in the Lower East Side. And Before we went to the club and 2 of my good friends arrived at the pregame before me, so they were both texting me. Like, where are you? Why are you late? that kind of thing. But this is important because they got to the pregame before me. And when I pregame. First of all, I pregamed before the pregame, but when I got to my friend's house, there was another girl that I'd never met before younger. Um, I don't know why that's relevant, but younger and had this insanely perfect body and I'm not using the word perfect lightly. Like her body was a Coke bottle and I look good. I look good as cat woman. Don't get me wrong. Like I was rocking that look. I felt sexy. I felt confident. I even bought a whip to accompany the look, but she had the exact. When I tell you the exact costume as me, so I was mortified when I arrived and I was also pissed at my friends. I was like, why would you not warn me? Like, why would you not tell me this girl also has the exact same costume as me and they thought it was hilarious because they were like, Nadine, we know you and if you knew that this girl had the same costume as you, you would have been even later. You probably wouldn't have worn it. And I was like, yeah, You're right. You're right. So anyway, I get there. We have a great time. Drinks are flowing. The impetus for me drinking even more was the fact that I felt a awkward wearing the same costume as her, even though she made it great and people thought we planned it. I felt awkward. And just for context, this is before Zoe Kravitz played Catwoman. I think that movie was like 2022. So I really thought this was going to be like a less popular look. I ended up leaving that pregame completely drunk. Beyond drunk leaving that pregame, We Uber to the club, and I don't remember all the specifics, but something happened where we thought we would be on the list. Our names would be on the list and they weren't. And I remember my 2 girlfriends did not want to stand in line. That particular Halloween was actually quite cold. I also didn't want to stand in line, but she was just like, no, this is ridiculous. I'm that person, especially when I was drinking that would do the thing that no one else wanted to do. So I'm like, okay, we don't want to stand in line. Let's just go straight to the bouncer. Let's just go to the front and demand. Entry. And so I did that. I do remember that. And it worked and he was like, who are you with? And I remember being like, Oh, my God, my friends come, come. So I got everyone in and that's where my night ends for me.

4:27

And now a quick word from our partners. It really feels like you're having a moment, pun intended, when you're sipping on the lovely and refreshing moment. Now what I love about moment is that not only does it taste delicious, I have my favorite flavors. I love the blood orange. I love the spicy mango, but it's also good for you, which is exactly what I need in my life right now as I'm in my early 20s. 30s. It's infused with L theanine, which is great for mental clarity. It also is packed with ashwagandha, which is great for helping to fight stress. It's made with all of these natural botanicals, which really enhances your vitality. It does not contain any added sugar. It's caffeine and of course alcohol free and you can purchase it in still or sparkling. I love a good sparkle moment so that's typically the route I take. In the morning it's great for a boost to start the day versus in the afternoon if you want to beat that afternoon slump and enhance your mental clarity. Or if you just need like a simple pick me up, like for me, I love to have a moment after the gym versus going into the gym because it just really helps re energize me. And then in the evening, if you want to wind down after a long, busy day and enjoy a delicious mocktail without the hangover, then Moment is great for that too. One of the best parts for me with Moment is I feel like it's a really conscientious brand. They donate 1 percent of all their sales to mental health non profits. So you can feel good about supporting greater causes as well. Head over to drinkmoment. com and use my code TSB23 to receive 12 percent off your very first order. Let's be moment buddies. We can both have moments together.

the-sober-butterfly_9_10-24-2024_072007: 6:12

While things were hazy, I remember by the end of the night, I'd lost track of how many drinks I'd had. At one point, I was sitting on the floor in the bathroom trying to adjust my costume because it was latex and a one piece. Also trying to use the bathroom was a nightmare. My friends were scattered across the club, and I just have these vague memories of wandering around feeling completely out of it. And the next morning I woke up with little recolition of how I got home. I had a massive headache and just that sinking feeling that I probably embarrassed myself in front of a bunch of people. When I checked my phone, the group chat was flooded with images of me from the night. Um, that whip I referenced earlier. I was whipping people in the club. I don't think they consented to that. Um, it was just one of those moments where I thought this can't be what fun is supposed to look like. I knew in that moment with the anxiety and the hangover and just the shame that, it wasn't supposed to be like that. people had fun on Halloween, but why was this my definition of fun? And why was this my experience

the-sober-butterfly_7_10-24-2024_071130: 7:28

yeah, I was whipping people in the club.

the-sober-butterfly_10_10-24-2024_072218: 7:30

Let's fast forward to my very 1st sober Halloween. I remember being a little bit nervous I thought me unlocking a level of confidence like strolling up to the bouncer and demanding that he let me and my friends in was directly connected to my drinking. But you know what it was actually 1 of the best Halloween's I've ever had. And I think it's just because I was present and I actually remembered everything. I got sober July, 2021. Halloween is obviously at the end of October. So I had, just about three months of sobriety, and I felt good about that. That was the longest stint of time I had gone. probably since my teens without drinking. So I felt proud of that accomplishment. But at the same time, I was still nervous because I like to have fun and I wasn't sure if I could have as much fun, even though we just talked about what my skewed definition of fun looked like back then, but I wasn't so sure that I could party without booze. And you know what? That first Halloween, I didn't party. I went home. I did still dress up because as reference, I love to dress up. And I actually dressed up as Billie holiday from her strange fruit album cover. So I had the beautiful orchid in my hair. I pinned it up. I wore this really elegant vintage dress. And I also convinced my family to dress up. So my mom was a hippie. My aunt was Bob Marley. My cousin, I think she was like a naughty school girl. There's photos. but we went to dinner, we had a nice dinner in Fort Lauderdale on the river and it just felt like a beautiful moment where I was surrounded by people that I loved, who supported my decision to not drink and while it wasn't traditionally how I have spent past Halloweens, that was honestly one of my favorite Halloweens.

the-sober-butterfly_11_10-24-2024_072814: 9:32

My second year sober for Halloween, I flew to Toronto and co hosted a party called Boos, no booze, like the title of this episode with Keisha over at done with debauchery. Keisha had a sober podcast called done with debauchery, amazing show and her and I connected via sober Instagram and at this stage of my sobriety. So this is going into about a year and change of sobriety. I had started making friends with people online, still didn't know a ton of sober people in real life, but I definitely felt connected to people like Keisha via social platforms there was just something amazing about Keisha and I can gush about her all day. Beautiful, talented, funny, intelligent, and sober. And with her having a podcast and me. Recently launching my podcast at this time, I was just like, hey, girl, I have a crazy idea and she was like, I love crazy. And so I was like, what if I came to Toronto where Keisha lives. And we

the-sober-butterfly_7_10-24-2024_071130: 10:41

do

the-sober-butterfly_11_10-24-2024_072814: 10:41

a couple of episodes for both of our podcast and she was all for it. She loved the idea and I was like, okay, I can already tell you're my type of girl. So I flew to Toronto and we did both episodes and they were a lot of fun. In the planning stages for the podcast outlining what we wanted to discuss, Keisha was like, well, hey, I've been thinking about hosting a sober Halloween party. there are a bunch of different sober girls that I've connected with Here in Toronto, and I've been meaning to get people together and I feel like if you're coming Halloween weekend, that could be the perfect opportunity and I was all in and so she actually came up with the concept or the name Boos, no booze. We had the party in her building. We had about 9 or 10 girls show up and it was just such good energy. I think that was the first time that I had ever been in a group setting with sober people and had fun. That moment really transformed not only the way I viewed having a sober Halloween but just the sense of connection that I felt was something that was new for me.

the-sober-butterfly_12_10-24-2024_073342: 11:53

And then last year I hosted my very own sober Halloween party and we had maybe. 20 people show up and it was the first time that I hosted my own party of this kind of magnitude where I was inviting random people to come who were not sober. Maybe they were sober curious. Maybe they just wanted to show up because there was free food and drinks, but the energy was real. The laughs were genuine and the memories are still with me today. I just want to show people that you don't need a social lubricant. You don't need to drink to unlock the very best version of yourself or the worst. But, you know, so I wanted to move on to our final segment, which is offering some tips for celebrating Halloween sober

12:43

It's really hard for me to prioritize reading and I love to read but Audible has really helped me be able to listen to you. I literally am looking at my app right now 34 titles in 2023 audible is the leading provider of spoken word entertainment and audiobooks and with audible you can turn any moment into a story time adventure imagine having access to an unmatched selection of audiobooks Exclusive podcast and more all in one place on your phone or your computer or whatever listening device you choose Audible is not just a library. It's a whole experience With a vast collection of genres from mystery to romance to self help and business Audible has something for everyone and here's the best part Your first month is on me That's right! A free trial to explore the world of Audible. Check the show notes below and visit audible. com slash tsb24 to start your free trial today. Don't miss out on an opportunity to discover the joy of listening. Whether you're a seasoned book lover or just getting started, Audible is the perfect companion for your reading journey. So why wait? Head over to audible. com slash TSB 24. Audible, because the best stories are meant to be heard.

the-sober-butterfly_13_10-24-2024_073850: 14:10

Okay. Tip number one, host your own sober Halloween party. If you're worried about being around alcohol this Halloween, why not just host your own party? You can be in control. You can have spooky decorations, fun Halloween themed games, and of course, alcohol free drinks. if you give people choice, they may choose to do a non alcoholic version of said drink because the trends are showing that more and more people are drinking less and less. I think planned activities really set the vibe as well. You can do a costume contest.. You can do like a DIY haunted house tour. Um, Halloween trivia is always a hit or you can do like a spooky movie marathon and have that be themed even. I think the girls right now are obsessed with practical magic, that movie from the nineties with Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman. You could replicate something aligned to that. Just some ideas to run with, but host your own sober Halloween bash. That's my first tip for you.

the-sober-butterfly_14_10-24-2024_074400: 15:14

My second tip to you is to be selective about your plans. I've had to learn from experience. You don't have to say yes to every party invite. It's okay. Saying no instead of yes to something you don't want to go to is a boundary. And you guys already know how I feel about boundaries. They are not a barrier. Negotiable. So if you, for whatever reason, don't want to be around a bunch of people or put yourself in a certain environment, then you have to communicate that and decline the invite, babe. If you're feeling Like going to a party or placing yourself in an ecosystem where people are drinking May trigger you then it's okay to sit that one out or make alternate plans my first sober Halloween I wasn't feeling confident enough to test my sobriety and go to a A bar, right, or go to even a party with my friends who are still drinking and love to drink even more on Halloween. I would recommend spending the night with. Sober people, whether that be your friends or family, or just people who are not focused on only drinking. you can host your own spooky night in. It doesn't have to be this big bash where, you know, 50 people come. I could just be a night in watching some of your favorite Halloween movies with popcorn.

the-sober-butterfly_15_10-24-2024_074726: 16:48

My third and final tip is to plan an exit strategy, and I went in depth in last week's episode around what that could look like, the warm Irish exit, the traditional Irish exit, basically how to party with your friends. As a sober person, especially if your friends are drinking, but yeah, you got to have an exit plan. So if you do attend a Halloween event where alcohol will be present, it's smart to just have that strategy, that exit strategy. I like to have a plan in place and the hope is that I won't have to necessarily implement it, but it gives me a sense of security knowing that it exists because I don't like to feel stuck. Okay. I don't like to feel stuck in a situation. I don't like to feel stuck in life. So if you are similar to me, I would recommend creating that. A real exit strategy Know how you're getting there. Know how you're getting home. Know who you can call if you feel triggered. Know who to stay away from, who's triggering it. It can get really nuanced, but you can make it as detailed or as general as you want to. And one more thing here. It's not quite an exit strategy, but one of my favorite party tricks is to bring my. Own non alcoholic drinks. I'm not relying on anyone, especially if I'm going to someone else's house or their party or their event. If it's not a sober specific event, I'm going to bring my own drinks. Beverages it is super easy to pop a little canned guia a little like 8 ounce can in my purse you can bring if you're going to someone's gathering a bottle of non alcoholic wine. I think people really appreciate that. Once again, people like options, and if you know anything about non alcoholic wine, it's usually de alcoholized, and so that could be a fun conversation you could have if you're like me, and you're weird and want to talk about reverse osmosis in the process of making non alcoholic wine. I'll stop there. But the point is, bring something, be in control of your own body. Destiny, you know, don't rely on other people to necessarily accommodate you. I think that there has been a shift in society and I would like to hope. That the host of sub party would be considerate enough or thoughtful enough to have non alcoholic options present. but at the same time, that's not necessarily their. Responsibility that is your responsibility. So have an exit strategy, but just in general, have a game plan to guide your sober Halloween.

the-sober-butterfly_16_10-24-2024_075254: 19:31

Okay, guys, we're gonna wind down here. I challenge you this year, whether it's your own party or someone else's to try a sober Halloween. You can make spooky non alcoholic cocktails, or you can plan a fun costume, but really my hope for you is that you enjoy the night without the fog of alcohol. You got this. Thank you guys for tuning in. If you're throwing a sober Halloween party, or you have a cool costume idea, share it with me on social media. You can find me on most social handles at the period sober by the fly. It's also linked below in the show notes. Remember, being sober doesn't mean that you're missing out. It just means that you're making the holiday. Even more memorable until next time have a spooky fun and sober Halloween. Bye.